We tell ourselves stories all the time and we don’t even realize it.
I’m bad at art. I suck at math. My sister’s the athletic one, or the pretty one. My brother’s the funny one, I didn’t get those genes. My relationships never work. I get nervous talking in front of people. Other people are smarter than me, I’ll never do what they did.
We’ve told ourselves these stories for so long that we’ve accepted them as true.
Once you’ve decided your brother is the funny one, you only see when his jokes get laughs and yours don’t. If you tell yourself you’re bad at art, you’ll never take that class or start the project that could have been your calling. Maybe you would have tried out for the team if you didn’t assume your sister was the athletic one.
Go back far enough and see if you can remember where these stories came from. When did the one thing happen and when did you wrap a narrative around it? How many years have you been adding to it and reinforcing it with “facts” that were carefully selected to match the story? How many opposing facts did you ignore or brush off as luck/chance/fluke/coincidence etc?
What if you could change the story? You can. You’re the only one you can. Realize that and you can – very literally – change your life.