I used to give away my happiness.
Or, more specifically, I would give away control of it. It started in grade school, “Good job on that test Andy,” “you’re so smart Andy.” Teachers would tell me that and I would beam. My self-worth went through the roof.
A few years later someone decides I was “good enough” to go to their college. Then someone else decides I was good enough to work at their company. Without realizing it, I had directly tired my self-worth to the acceptance of these strangers.
If the praise wasn’t there, I would start to feel low or unsatisfied, unfulfilled. And then I’d blame the class, the job, the relationship, whatever it was that wasn’t giving me the praise I needed.
That’s a mistake though, that self-worth should come from me. It has to.
If it doesn’t, then I’m giving away control of my happiness. No one else cares about my happiness as much as I do – so why should they be in charge?
Who’s in charge of yours?